I'm practically dead inside now. The rest of the day was super fun. But now I'm just dead. My parents completely ruined it. After the party, my dad talked to me about the party. I gave him straight answers, and he took it personally, thinking I was giving him an additude I think. At the turn at the light, he was starting to say "I'm sorry to pry into oyur life" "I'm sorry I'm asking too many questions" "I'm sorry..." with great sarcasm, like he normally does. I didn't answer him with that. I know where it was leading, so I just stayed silent. He took it as another bad thing...... again. Besides, if I were to even say anything, he would of taken it as a bad thing anyway. So.. yea. Afterwards I told him if it was okay if I could take a shower, in a nice tone mind you, as my hair was all hair-spray ish and gel-like (i used those tow things to style my hair). We finally made it home, and he told my mom saying "Don't ask too many questions or she'll get moody". My mom asked practically the same questions, and I gave her, I think, the same answers that I gave my dad. Then my dad started to rant about my additude, and my mom got into a hissy fit. Then they both jumped to the conclusion that I wanted to stay later.. and I was like: What. The. Fuck. (I didn't say that, but I sure damn look like I was) I was completely defenseless, and they were all acting like --supposedly-- they figured me out. Pshaw. It would be the apocalypse if they could do that. My mom was all saying: I'm not going to treat you like a human being anymore, I'm going to treat you like a kid. And when the whole thing was finally over, and I was in my room, my door was open so I could hear my mom say out loud purposely: You grounded. You not going to do anything next weekend except for that Horseback ride thing as Amy was persistent on that. Which means. no. trick. or. treating. No halloween. No nothing. My favorite holiday. gone. I did nothing. Seriously. And the take away my favorite holiday. To tell the truth. I feel nothing. I feel so dead inside. Like I have no purpose to live, feel, or be me anymore. But I'm crying as I type this... the keys all blurry to me. Why?

(I'm sorry that I didn't do the black background. It's just that.. I'm feel so.. screwed up that I can't pull myself to do it. Right now all I want to do it lay on my bed.. and do nothing.. feel nothing.. be nothing)